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Great Book of School Jokes

Why didn't the young rooster crow in the morning?

How does the abominable snowman clean his tecth?

How do you groom a rabbit?

With a hare brush.


Dick Whittington

Many years ago there lived a boy called Dick whittington.
Dick's mother and father had died

when he was very young.

There was no one to look after him, and he was very poor,

so he decided to go to London to seek his fortune.


The Town Mouse and The Country Mouse

There was once a small brown mouse who lived in a little nest at the edge of a field, deep in the countryside. Life in the country was not easy and he had to work hard to find food, but he was perfectly content.


The Magic Porridge Pot

Once Upon a time a little girl met an old womn. 

The old woman gave her a magic porridge pot.

"Cook, little pot, 

cook," said the old woman.

And the little pot cooked some

porridge.


Key Words 08 Big House (b Series)

This morning there are some letters for Peter, Jane and their father. The children like to get letters from their frieds. Their mother and father help them to read some of these letters, but some others they can read on their own.


Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

After a time, they put Snow White in a glass conffin on a hillside. She looked as if she was sleeping. 

One day, a prince came by. He saw Snow White lying in the coffin, and fell in love with her.


A Visit To The Restaurant

"Would you like to go to 

this restaurant for lunch,

 Baby Bop?" ask Barney.

"Oh, yes! answers Baby

Bop."I love pizza."

"Great!" says Barney.

"Let's go inside!"


Karen's Yo-Yo (Baby-Sitters Little Sister #119)

Karen can do lots of great tricks with her new yo-yo. But when she takes it to school to show her friends, the yo-yo shows Karen a brand-new trick. It disappears! It is not magic. Somebody has taken Karen’s yo-yo. And Karen is going to figure out just who the meanie-mo is.


Dear Dumb diary

If somebody ever asks you to kick her in the face, the first thing she will do is forget that she asked you to do it.

Isabella was over today, and we were working on my hair. I cut my hair really short over the summer and thought that it might grow back ....


Zodiac Girls: Recipe for Rebellion

Danu used to have tons of friends and did well in school. But that was before her dad went away for work and left her with her cold, workaholic aunt. As a Sagittarius, Danu longs for space and company. When she can't get either, Danu rebels at school, changing from a straight-A student into every teacher's worst nightmare. When a Web site search reveals that she is a Zodiac Girl, Danu is skeptical at first, but soon her zodiac guardians are pointing her back in the right direction. Danu learns that she must take responsibility for her own happiness and that when life hands you a difficult card, it's how you play that counts.


Welcome to Alien Inn

When Matt and his family are stranded during a blizzard they take shelter in a roadside inn. The innkeeper keeps staring at Matt, and the other guests ask him weird questions. What's more they cook the strangest breakfasts and their language is out of this world.


A Long Way Home

Helen has lived with her mother, a cook for the Bradleys, since she was five. When her mother dies, and her father killed in the Great War, Mrs Bradley says she has to go and live in an orphanage. Helen refuses and runs away, trying to get a another position, whilst looking for her father's family.


Makeover Madness

Leanne thinks her school's rubbish - so when she sees an advert asking people to apply to have their school transformed, she sends off a letter. To her delight the tv company pick her school for a makeover. She and her friends are so excited - this will be their chance to get some of their ideas for the playground, dining hall, and classroom put into practice. But as the makeover week wears on, the kids realize that, once again, it's the adults who are taking over and ruining things.


Amelia Jane Is Naughty Again

Amelia Jane is big, bad and the terror of the toy cupboard! Will Amelia Jane ever stop? Now she's causing chaos with a boomerang, scribbling all over the nursery walls and playing all sorts of tricks on Mr Up-and-To! Sometimes the toys manage to trick her back, and she promises to be good from now on. But can the world's naughtiest doll ever be good?


The Whipping Boy

A young orphan named Jemmy rouses from his sleep. "Ain't I already been whipped twice today? Gaw! What's the prince done now?" It was forbidden to spank, thrash, or whack the heir to the throne. Jemmy had been plucked from the streets to serve as whipping boy to the arrogant and spiteful Prince Brat.


Horrible Science: Disgusting Digestion

Gross! This detailed, gory book, filled with cartoon panels and explanatory tables, takes a close view at how the human body digests food and extracts nutrients. Overflowing with fun facts, including why farts are beneficial, and the necessity of a go


Secrets

India lives in a large, luxurious house with a mum she can't stand and a dad she adores, though he hasn't had much time for her recently. She seeks solace in her journal, which she keeps in sincere imitation of her heroine, Anne Frank. Treasure lives on the local council estate with her loving and capable grandmother. She is devoted to her nan but lives in fear of having to go back to live with her mother and violent stepfather.

A chance meeting sparks a great friendship between the girls. And when Treasure has to run away to avoid her stepfather, India comes up with a hiding place inspired by her favourite writer.


Kid Power

This is about how I found my ture calling.

According to my father, I found it pretty young in life. (I'm eleven going on twelve.) He didn't find his until he was in college. He's a lawyer for labor unions,


Too Ghoul for School: French Frights

St Sebastian's School in Grimesford is the pits. No, really it is. Built on the boggy remains of a medieval plague pit, this once proud school's dodgy nineteenth-century foundations are causing it to slowly subside. Every year it sinks a little further into the ground, and every year the ghosts of the plague victims underneath become more disgruntled. All they want is to rest in peace, but during term time all they hear is the clatter of hundreds of pairs of high school kids' feet overhead. The ghosts - egged on by their spooky ringleader, Edith Codd - decide to get their own back, and they're willing to play dirty. Really dirty. They swarm into the St Sebastian's sewer system and start to kick up a stink the only way they know how.

Popping up through pipes and taps, they invade the school, morphing into monsters and zombies, performing possessions and hauntings, and generally causing as much mischief as in inhumanly possible. But the ghosts haven't reckoned on a new kid and his mates in year seven. Can James and his friends get to the bottom of the problem and flush out the ghosts, or will every terms at St Sebastian's be plagued with misery?


La nuit blanche de Mathieu

Les animaux de la ferme fêtent par un banquet l'arrivée de l'été. Le petit Mathieu est témoin des festivités où chacun des convives doit présenter une histoire, un conte ou encore une anecdote. Un texte entraînant, de lecture facile.


Sophie Is Seven

Small, but very determined, Sophie loves animals and is going to be a farmer when she grows up. In this book she visits a farm, makes a big impression at the school concert, celebrates her seventh birthday and starts riding lessons!


Secret Friend

Steve's first day at school is the worst. Then he meets Adrian. Relieved and grateful for Adrian being so friendly, Steve soon discovers that no one likes Adrian, especially the class bullies. How can Steve be his friend and avoid the bullies?


James and the Giant Peach

A dramatization of James' adventures as he escapes from his fearful aunts by rolling away inside a giant peach. Includes suggestions for staging, easy-to-make costumes and scenery, and lighting procedures.


Bonding with Bears

Animals can be cute . and cruel! Read Ben's journal for some brilliantly bloody bear secrets. Meet Rocky the brown bear cub and join in the fun as he swaps blows with his sister and feasts on fish. Relive the drama, dangers and disgusting details as you find out: Why bears don't pee for six months How to track a wild bear What are the best bear games How teddy bears got their name Wild Lives - animal action, with bite!